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Epic Rap Battles Of History - Bonnie And Clyde Vs Romeo And Juliet Lyrics

(Bonnie and Clyde)
I'll handle this darling
I'm known to fire off some Bars
Cause if these lovers cross me
They're gonna end up seeing stars

I mean I'll let you go first
But damn sure I'm gettin' licks in
On this hissy fittin' rich kid
And this prepubescent vixen

I'm sick of them
Let's beat 'em then
And we can rob 'em blind
I'll stick this punk up from the front
I'll take this broad from behind

And pop a cap in the ass
Of the last Capulet heiress
Give miss no nights in Paris
A reason to cry to her parents

Oh Romeo O Romeo
Wherefore you tryin' to flow yo?
Mofo you soft as a froyo
Are those the drapes of your clothes bro?

There's gonna be a tragedy
Make your ache like your balls
On a balcony

Barrow gang put their money
Where their mouth is
Spit sick like a plague on both your houses

(Romeo and Juliet)
My love, your face if beauty to behold
I will protect thine honor from these dust bowl dildos

A moment's break from your gaze
In an eternity past
So together we shall both
Put these bitches on blast

En guard
Thou artless beetle headed flax wench
The only insult you have thrust
Upon me is thine stench

Why don't you twist upon these nuts
I hear you're good with a wrench
The dismal state of your raps
Should be a federal offense

And you there
Wench with the neck of a chicken
You'll get an ass rippin worse
Then your boyfriend's in prison

You're not a true romance
You're just a conjugal visit
Oh, but that's not even
Your real husband, now is it?

(Bonnie and Clyde)
Hey partner
You best put a muzzle on your missus
'Fore I teach her how we handle
Disrespect down in Texas

(Romeo and Juliet)
Do you quarrel sir?
Ho, shall I draw my long sword
Or will you duck your chicken shit ass
Back into your Ford?

(Bonnie and Clyde)
How could you beat my man
In some mano a mano?
You can't protect your best friend
From some John Leguizamo

(Romeo and Juliet)
No, no, my Romeo will beat your beau
In contest blow for blow
He will do upon thine dick
What you hath done upon your toe

Oh, I am killed, what irony is this?
The lead role shot down by a failed actress
Then I shall kill myself on my stomach I shall lie
So you louts can lick my ass
Thus with a dis I die

Oops nevermind
My flesh was merely grazed
Where's Romeo? Oh Nomeo!
There's poison on your face!

Oh happy dagger pierce me true
Persuate my breath to stop
Sheath yourself inside my heart
And like the beat I drop

(Bonnie and Clyde)
Well that was tragic
That did not go as expected
Woulda done that boy some good to
Just wait a couple seconds

Its kinda sad though really
So young to have just died
Well, at least we got each other
Just Bonnie and