You were convulsing in the next room
So I lay awake in bed
Prayed to a God I don't believe in
So that he may keep you safe
I could hear my father's fingers
Carve their way into the wood of your door frame
Mother shaking
As your eyes rolled back into your head again
Just as we thought death would prevail
Febrile response gave way to pale
Cavities to fingernails
Anxiety had left me frail
But I felt then as I feel now
Despite the detriment you've faced
It is your warmth that's made me proud
Though I barely remember
It was you who smoothed my ache
In the depth of my depression
I thought my life was mine to take
But I am forever in your debt
For things that you could never say
All the love that I have felt
You gave, with no intention to take
I am as the moon
Any affection that my glow is the subject of
Belongs to you
For I am nothing more than a reflection of you
And your love