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Nofx - My Penis Lyrics

My penis is like a hot-dog,
but I don't get monthly blood drips
My penis hardly even used
My penis's got lots of extra skin
They took my outtie and made it an in
Changing Donnie to Marie Osmond

Operation, successful
But now I gotta pee
Through a miniature hole
Gotta remember to put the seat down
And when I wipe my ass
I go from front to back
Cause I don't want a bladder infection

I never thought I'd miss my vas deferans
I trade it in for a pair of used cans
Now I get to hang with lesbians

Operation, paid up front
Now I show all my friends
My new designer cunt
They think I'm kinda weird
But that's ok with me
Cause now I kick their ass
Played from the gentlemens tee
There's nothing finer
Than having a penis